Day 149: Covenant Christy

Lately as I have conversations with other conventers, I find that some people expect… or maybe it’s that they hope… to have the same results as me. Nooooooot to sound cocky, but I think that if I was watching someone else undergo a similar transformation… well, I would want it too. So many of the people that know me have seen me go from 210 down to 160 (well, that’s what I weighed the last time I weighed a few weeks ago) and that’s a big change. Even I have had to make myself acknowledge the change a few times because it seems so drastic for just four short months.

But, God tends to be drastic sometimes.

But, God also tends to work differently through each of us. He works at different speeds. He moves our lives according to the “big picture”. He blesses some with an abundance of worldly gifts and some with eternal gifts. He is just… God.

And so I want to say first and foremost, that no one is going to have this covenant experience. It is mine. It is God’s. And that combination cannot be replicated. Which… is kind of cool for me: this moment in time as I write these words is completely and utterly unique. And it should be cool for you… this moment in time reading these words is completely and utterly unique.

All of that to say… I’m going to bring up my friend Christy again. I know, I know… I talk about her a lot. It’s just that she’s so extremely open about her life, her feelings, her thoughts, her experiences, etc. So, she gives me a lot of material to work with! Haha!

And Christy still has not lost weight… in fact, she has gained weight. So, I asked her the question the other day that I have had to ask myself many a time, “If you had to blame it on something, what do you think is causing it?” She knew pretty quickly what to say. She said, “I need to lay off the fruit salad.” Well, I’ll be honest. I was a little surprised that a bunch of fruit salad would make her gain weight… until she clarified that it wasn’t just plain fruit salad. It had fruit, and pecans, and some kind of fake cool whip. And she said she was really hittin it when the kids would go to bed. She’d sit at her laptop and eat fruit salad.

And her truthful self-analysis led me to do a bit of a self-analysis as well…

At the time I responded that I think part of why I have lost weight is because I really don’t eat as much as I used to. Like, she does a great job of making sure that her family is well fed. She makes meals. She keeps good produce in her house. And, well, I’m not like that (wish I was, but I’m not), and so quite often I would find myself coming up upon lunch and thinking, “Well, hmmmmmm, nothing much to eat, so I guess I’ll have a bowl of tomato basil soup. or sweet potato fries. or a salad.” Whatever was easiest. And often the easiest thing didn’t have a whole lot to it, so I was cutting down on the amount of what I was eating.

Now, my portion control is a bit more under control simply because I’m eating less and less “stuff” (i.e. chips and bread) and instead more fruit (like, I made a deal with myself to only eat fruit when I’m snacking). Plus, I have been really focusing more and more as the covenant goes on with the beneficial versus permissible and eating in such a way that would make God pleased. So, even though this really started out as a Daniel Fast… more often than not, my covenant is less about what I am eating and more about how much I am eating. First, I had to cut things out (like chocolate and meat) to just get over the “I have to have” mindset. But once I got past that, then I have had to refocus on “I need more” versus “I want more”.

And that’s what it boils down to… not only am I eating closer to what I think God intended my body to eat, but also I’m eating closer to the amount that God intended my body to eat. Eventually, my weight loss will stop because I will have, truly, found my body’s homeostasis.

But, in the meantime… honestly… I’m totally fine with losing weight! Haha!

 

Day 125: Uh Oh…

Haha – well, I knew what I wanted to title this already but I just sorta started to think that someone might look at just the title in their inbox and think, “Oh, poor January, she musta broken her covenant again. Bless her heart.” (Which, I’m a southern woman… “Bless her heart” never means that for real, it means, “Oh thank heavens someone has messed up so I can feel better about myself!” haha)

But, it’s not so much about that at all (Thank Ya Jesus!) but about a friend of mine that called a couple of days ago (whom I have yet to call back because I’m a crazy woman with crazy kids that can’t seem to be quiet long enough for me to make a phone call and when they are sleeping, I have to be quiet so that they can sleep, y’all know the drill… even if you don’t have kids then you probably have some crazy sister-in-law or cousin who has young kids… we tend to be pretty crazy protective of the nap time!!!). She recently started the covenant and called saying that she was a little freaked out because she had gained four pounds.

So I’m going to write my friend Rhonda a post in response to her call… sorta kill two birds with one stone, ya know? Plus, I had another friend, Christy, who had the exact same thing happen to her.

First of all, I don’t know! haha! I had no idea that I would lose weight myself so quickly. I had no idea if I would lose weight at all… I just hoped that I would.

GET OFF TOSS THE SCALE: So, really, my first thing would be to say that it cannot be about the weight. If I have learned anything through this process, it is to not weigh. Allow your clothes not fitting to be your only guide if you have to have a guide… as difficult as that may be. We just need to forget all of this weight stuff… these arbitrary numbers. This body of ours that God has designed is infinitely complex and it responds to eating, not eating, changing diets, etc. exactly as it should. So, if you know that you are eating foods that honor God and only eating until you are satisfied/no longer hungry, then just turn your focus to Him. Which leads me to my next point…

FOCUS ON HIM: I think that the best part of the covenant so far as been how much it has forced me to read the Word of God. I mean, like I have said, I have been reading through the bible since October but this has taken it to a whole new level because I am relying on the Word to save me (in a non-get-salvation-go-to-heaven kind of way, of course). When I need some of those things that I turned to food for before (comfort, entertainment, relief, relaxation, etc), now I turn to the Word (well, at least 95% of the time – haha… okay, okay, 92% of the time). And it has been so awesome to see Him sustain me with just the Word. It truly is POWER and it keeps me from overeating or eating when I’m not hungry or eating what I have agreed not to eat… which leads me to my next point as well…

WHAT’S THE PROB: I think it’s important to take a real-honest-to-God look at myself every once in a while and evaluate the way I eat and decide if I think it honors God or not. Most of the time… well, actually, so far… All of the time that I have been gaining or not losing it has been because:

  • I was overeating (eating when I’m not hungry for some “other” reason that wasn’t hunger and/or eating when I am already full) or because
  • I was eating too many processed or “easy” foods (i.e. bread, tortillas, peanuts, cheese) instead of foods that would really honor God because they are beneficial for my body (i.e. fruits and vegetables).

In fact, this has been really good for me to write about because I have been going through a similar “Why am I not losing?” kind of phase. I think that knocking out the bread and chips will help me out in that area because they were becoming an all-too-frequent “go to” but I also think that I’m going to come up with a new rule for myself… if I am hungry and it’s not a meal (like it’s snack time) then I can eat fruit. I still don’t tend to “default” to fruit even though it completely rox my sox and I really have gotten to the point where I love it…

  1. I just need to have it around all the time so I need to be more diligent about getting to the store… the same way I am about whole milk for my toddler I need to be about fruit for me… if we are out then I need to get my bootie to the store and load up, and
  2. I need to help renew my mind so that it defaults to fruit. I have gotten my mind to “default” to the Word to sustain me and now I need to retrain this “go to” into a fruit thang.

Okay, Rhonda, again… sorry for not calling back but turns out it was really good for ME to have to sit down and sort of hash this out! Haha! And well, it IS all about me, right?!!? Haha! Either way, this post is for you!!!

Update: Rhonda texted me a couple days after this post to let me know that she had lost 7 pounds but was gonna stay off the scale for the next month and a half! Blessings and peace to Rhonda!