Today I had no energy to think about cooking… or eating… or anything! It was a cold, rainy day and my oldest boy woke up about 8,324 times last night because the downspout is right outside his window and it essentially sounds like a battle going on out there when it rains. So, needless to say I was in sleepy-survival mode.
And when he asked for pancakes for lunch, I was relieved that he requested something simple. (He does not have my issue with gluttony… getting him to eat anything is a miracle, so he pretty much gets to eat whatever he asks for… within reason, of course.) But I didn’t want to think about what to cook for myself too, so I thought… okay, pancakes are essentially bread. I can eat bread. It’s not like I put syrup on my pancakes anyway. I shouldn’t have a problem with them.
Well…… yes. And no.
I guess in the pancake mix that I use there is juuuuuuust enough sugar to have made those pancakes taste like the most delectable treat that I have ever had in my life. And there popped up my gluttony in a heartbeat. I ate, like, seven of them. Now they were like little silver dollar pancakes, but the point is that I was completely and totally satisfied after three of them.
I didn’t cross the “line” of the covenant technically, but oh my I sure was standing directly on it. And it backfired. So my mind renewal is that I’m attempting to be above reproach. I don’t want to get ON the line… I want to stay as far AWAY from the line as possible. And here, I “sweet talked” (haha, another diet pun) myself into thinking that those pancakes would be okay for me. But in the end, they didn’t satisfy my soul. Those dern pancakes made me feel empty and defeated. By oversatisfying my body, my soul ended up feeling starved. And some food for thought on that point (hehe, get it… “food” for thought?!?!?! I know. I’m a nerd.)…
O God, you are my God; I earnestly search for you. My soul thirsts for you; my whole body longs for you in this parched and weary land where there is no water. I have seen you in your sanctuary and gazed upon your power and glory. Your unfailing love is better than life itself; how I praise you! I will praise you as long as I live, lifting up my hands to you in prayer. You satisfy me more than the richest feast. I will praise you with songs of joy. I lie awake thinking of you, meditating on you through the night. Because you are my helper, I sing for joy in the shadow of your wings. I cling to you; your strong right hand holds me securely. Psalm 63:1-8