Re: Hey! I found your blog last night…

Hey! I found your blog last night as I was googling. I too struggle with overeating. I have been on a chronic dieter and lately all it’s doing is driving me crazy! I was wondering where you are now in your journey. What foods are you staying away from? I feel like I will probably have to do something drastic to find victory and freedom. I just don’t know what to do or how to stick to anything.

I got this message today from someone on facebook and I started to write a reply to her on there, but then I thought… hey, maybe everyone would like to know this… soooooo, here’s my “update”. It started out as an actual “reply” and then sorta morphed into a message to… everyone…

I’m on a bit of a struggle myself right now to be perfectly honest! I have found though that when I stick to the foods on my list (thecovenantdiet.com/what-i-eat) I’m totally golden!

But that’s the hard part. Notice how I said I’m golden WHEN I stick to the foods on my list! I get caught up in the three-day-diet cycle… I can stick to it for three days and then I crater and then I eat like crap for four days (cause everyone knows that you can’t start anything until a Monday, right??? Ha!). When I made the commitment originally and I committed for a year, I was totally great… it was almost easy… but then as soon as I was “done” with that year I started to do that justification game with sweets: “Oh it’s a special occasion.” or “Oh I don’t really have any good food in the house” and my fav “Well, I already messed up for the day so might as well go for it!“, etc. But then it got to the point where I stopped caring… even if I committed my eating and my nutrition to God. I think my subconscious knew that the main reason I was committing to God was only because I wanted to get the weight off again – not that I actually cared what God thought.

I think that it bothers me MORE that I’m going through a phase of not really caring either way if I’m honoring God or not… that’s more worrisome than needing a larger pair of jeans.¬†Keeping it real…

I need to get myself connected with God through habitually meeting with Him every single day.

I have completely neglected that very thing over the past year or two and I can tell that it is permeating into every little aspect of my life. Like, I don’t care right now that my kids are sitting playing our iPad for the past hour. I don’t care that my kitchen looks like the cabinets vomited out every single plate, cup, and utensil we own. I don’t care that I have a week of laundry piled up. I don’t care that my hair looks a mess. I don’t care that I’ve stayed up until midnight for four days in a row and I am killllllling my body, my mind, my patience, my willpower. I don’t care that I just ate half a bowl of cookie dough. Heck…

I don’t even care that I don’t care!

Okay, well, I sorta do care about that one a little. I guess that’s why I’m writing this. But what I do know is that my soul won’t change… my soul won’t care unless I go to The One that made my soul. The One who crafted me. The One who genuinely cares that I… care.

Will meeting with Him every day “fix” me? Geez. I dunno. Will meeting with Him every day help to realign who I am with what I am meant to be: a blessing? Well, it is certainly a start.

But y’all. I ain’t gonna lie…

I need help.

I need some encouragement to do that! I don’t have anyone in my life that I am committed to in that regard… maybe one of you will commit with me. I don’t know… maybe we can make one of those facebook groups or something? Some place… some people… where I can be reminded every day to go to Him who will remind me every day that I am intended to be a blessing and where I can remind you that you are intended to be a blessing. Where we can remind each other that we love the Word of God. That we NEED the Word of God. Where we can remind each other that a focus on Him is a blessing to us and then that’s a blessing to the world. To be told time and time again that this food thing is only to distract us from our purpose.

I totally feel like I’m putting out there some kind of “Will you be my friend” plea or something! Haha! But, hey, why not?!?!?! Will you? Will you be my friend? I’ll be your friend! We can help each other look to God… I just know it. What do you think???

Maybe, comment on here if you have an idea or would want to “be my friend” (haha)… or if you are on facebook or twitter let me know on there by commenting on a post or replying to a tweet. Let’s see what we can figure out!

(And thanks to Miss Facebook Message Girl for messaging me… I know that you were reaching out for yourself, but your message will hopefully end up as a blessing to all of us!)

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Comments

  1. says

    I have followed you for quite sometime – your story is very similar to mine – did a biblically based weight loss program in 2011/2012 – then hit a large bump in the road fall 2013 and have gained 30+ lbs on my petite frame (from sz 4-12) and am just down trying to climb out of a spiral of “don’t care” Would love to friend you on FB or Twitter FB: Sheryl Simpson Twitter :Sheryl1700

    • says

      YES! Let’s definitely be friends… I found you on twitter first cause that one’s easier to find people on! If you like The Covenant Diet facebook page https://www.facebook.com/TheCovenantDiet then I can find you easier on there as well. I am confident in the guidance of God and the power of fellowship that we will find our way back to “caring”!

  2. peggy white says

    http://simplytaralynn.com It always makes me happy to see you are in my inbox. If you have time look at this young girls journey she is quite amazing. I’m not a facebooker or tweeter but I’m in it with you. Peggy

    • says

      What kind words!!! I’m trying to see if there is a way for us to do a group that isn’t facebook or twitter based! I’m looking into it… I think we all need each other!

  3. Rachel says

    You are not morally good for eating certain foods and morally bad for eating others. Have you ever considered just stopping and being okay with it? Seriously, how can you stop being a chronic dieter, but by quitting dieting? There is power in just letting go and giving your weight over to God and trusting Him with it. For many years I gained and lost the same 30 pounds until I finally just gave the whole thing over to God. No rules, no forbidden foods, just trusting Him to use the body he created to inform me when I was hungry and inform me when I was full. And you know what, it worked. But, you know how it worked? My body settled at that upper weight and stayed there consistently without requiring any mental energy. Your body is a gift, no matter the size. Just think of everything it does for you every day? We need to stop hating on it and hating on ourselves, making our own rules, berating ourselves for a perceived lack of self-discipline and instead be grateful and release that mental energy for other more important things. My friends and husband don’t see me any different being a higher weight that my own previous expectations. Instead, they love and enjoy that I’m free from the bondage of the diet trap, free to live my life and focus on the more important things in life. Just let go. You can trust Him with your eating and food. It really does balance itself out. You can only eat sugar so long before you just naturally crave a salad. You are ALREADY amazing. Big or small…it doesn’t matter. If we all grew up on the same street with no media influence and the ability to compare ourselves with thousands of other women via tv and the internet, we’d see that real life people are pretty much the same. Some will be bigger than us, some will be smaller, and that’s the way it should be. I hope when you look in the mirror today, God reminds you he loves you, just the way you are, and that you BELIEVE it. :)

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